Blog Revamp!

There's a change in the air. Seasons are changing, time is, people are..

So why shouldn't my blog.

Transitions and transitions

Phases and phases.

Colors of the Universe

Splashed out here on these pages

Full of thoughts and shattered dreams

But appearance is what matters

If the pages are bright, each negative must have a positive connotation

What irony! What optimism

Read on!

Diffused thoughts

"Where am I, where have I reached", she screams

"In distorting dreams of pain,

In depths of pleasured agony,

Where all goodness lies slain."

Is Goodness what it really is,

In this realm of the unreal.

Is she a disciple to the devil,

And did he teach her to feel?

Her mind's a treasure trove of all

That claims to be experience,

Her heart melts at every step

As she weeps for deliverance

Through torrential rains of trouble

She has made it up this far

Buried conscience somewhere along the way

At some unearthly hour

She smiles at everything she learns

Coz knowledge's all she's got

And answers the inner rebel's call

To escape from loneliness' draught

And as she finds her step in the dark,

In this nightmare of old

She holds together her damaged pride

By threads of weathered stone

A ringing laugh in the ghostly chasm

As she falls effortlessly through

"I will rise from the ashes below

And against all, emerge anew"

Transformation

Extricating the droplets of pride, from the ocean of self immolation, into a fire of eternal passion, to find another world away from mine

Hiding from a destiny that never was, in a shelter that never is, nestled in a hope that shouldn't be, to an end I could never accept

Dissolving in feelings that I can't define, absorbing a numbness I can't believe, lost in a dilemma that i don't like, yet captivated by reality

A conquest that is barely a win, an ally the devil within, lost in an immoral whim, that maybe my only reason to smile

Conjectures of yesterday, where minds and souls and bodies play, the memories of a different today, a connect against the tide

The end the beginning must be, the satyrs of bygones must rest unknowingly, and we be bound despite the anomaly, that we will never be one.

Seasonal contemplations

[ The first rain is superbly inspiring. A by-product of the same]

Drops of rain,

Chilling to the core

A swift breeze dousing you in a fragrance

Shivers and sighs,

Clinging fabrics

An explosion of green greeting the eyes

Puddles and splashes

Children’s laughter brightening the streets

Thrilling thunderstorms

And then the lightening, lighting up dark corners,

That tiny fear of revelation

Then the ringing laugh of security

Waterfalls down the hillsides

A million birds chirping at a moment’s respite

Grumbles and groans

At the tiniest indication of the mundane

Spicy scents from every neighborhood shop

Tantalizing the senses further

Unexplained hunger

Satiated by little, by few

Prospects of expeditions

Of adventure

And then of returning home

To a warm bath

Deep philosophical contemplations

Over liquid pleasures

Emotions unveiled through cryptic words.

Invitations to interact

Or implications of solitude

Smiles tears groans moans

Together with the world, or completely alone

“People are afraid of themselves, of their own reality; their feelings most of all. People talk about how great love is, but that's bullshit. Love hurts. Feelings are disturbing. People are taught that pain is evil and dangerous. How can they deal with love if they're afraid to feel? Pain is meant to wake us up. People try to hide their pain. But they're wrong. Pain is something to carry, like a radio. You feel your strength in the experience of pain. It's all in how you carry it. That's what matters. Pain is a feeling. Your feelings are a part of you. Your own reality. If you feel ashamed of them, and hide them, you're letting society destroy your reality. You should stand up for your right to feel your pain.”

--- Jim Morrison

Simply love this quote

On death

“I wouldn't mind dying in a plane crash. It'd be a good way to go. I don't want to die in my sleep, or of old age, or OD...I want to feel what it's like. I want to taste it, hear it, smell it. Death is only going to happen to you once; I don't want to miss it.”
--- Jim Morrison

The doors genius ironically died of an OD. Life laughs at us sometimes. A friend introduced me to this quote and it got me thinking. How would I want to die?
I don’t know. But I don’t think I want to hear it. Coz all I’ll hear is people calling me back. I don’t want to taste it, coz there’ll be a bitterness of things not accomplished, not done, not experienced in a lifetime. And I definitely don’t want to smell the nauseating fear attached with it.
I would rather die in my sleep.
Jim also said,

“People fear death even more than pain. It's strange that they fear death. Life hurts a lot more than death. At the point of death, the pain is over. Yeah, I guess it is a friend.”

I don’t fear death. I guess I fear pain though, my own and others’. I want to be gone in a flash. Before anyone has time to grieve, to realize, to prepare. Just evaporate if possible. Just disappear.
When it comes though, I don’t want to be ready. Coz I’ll never be brave enough to die. It should sneak in from the back and whisk me away to the other land…..

The Ceremony of Loss

Gone,
Far away, far from my world
To a world of your own
Created without me, with a love rightfully yours
My world,
Now without smiles, without peace, without contentment
All siphoned off as ransom for the time you gave me
I have but little resentment
Cause I was more at fault you see
A mystic curse on me,
That which a strength was,
That which I never thought a weakness would be
Filled now,
With an emptiness, a numbness to all but pain
Tears,
My companion in times of trouble,
Try to shield me,
The me devoid of hope, facing reality.
The sky wept,
Wept at the ceremony
The ceremony of my loss that the world celebrated
The sky,
Wept at myfolly, wept to wash my tears away with its
Scarred,
Scarred for now, for the tomorrows that will come
Longing to let go of the memories
And dying to keep some
Sauntering in a dream that I knew
would never be true
Yet unwilling to dream anew
Wish,
A wish I would never wish I'd wish
And then wish to find a way
To think beyond the memories of that day
Think beyond the colors, the shades
The exhilaration
Antithetical to mine
To the darkness in my being
Drowning,
Losing control on everything
Moving slowly to the other side
Hoping for respite, for comfort
To feel a simple peace inside.
Away
Away
Far away from here
From you
All that I remember of you
Simply away...
To Shangri-la, to another terrain
To live again
and die once more......